chaos!

ydae...my parents decided to "redesign" the bedrm so that my bro can have a r, for himself!! >:( wateva!! so is like they moved my sis' n my bkshelf n studytables! wah! nw our rm so crowded!!! n my bro has as a rm for himself! aargghhh!!! but ydae was really irritating! man! i have realized that the older u get the more stressful u get n the more stressful u get the more anooying u get! omg! i mean first it was my mom...she started first then my dad! haiyoh...small thing oso wanna shout one! n my bro one more headache! i noe he is getting older n needs his space to himself! but of cos i wont accept that as an excuse to irritate my parents or my sis or even me! n i wont accept that as an excuse to nt listen to my parents n to show them this attitude that u always make u wanna kill that person! oh how annoying! n nw i gt no bed to slp on! i have alot to say but i dunno hw to put them in words! wateva!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

not bad!

hey! haha...i like my 'cher! she is very friendly! today i learnt the basics of the basics! quite confusing but i noe i will catch up soon! :) surprising there were only 3 ppl today! but u noe....the thing that encourages me even more is the fact that my teacher said i sing very well fr one who dusnt noe classicals. she wants me to be regular n learn to sound even better! man m i excited!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

some things new...

guess wat....i am gonna attend my first ever indian classical singing lessons! as someone with grt hidden talents and the hunger to be exposed to the outside world so demanding....i have lots n loads of interest in singing! wen i was younger....my parents cldn't afford to send me for singing lessons. altho my interests were, n still are, mostly tamil songs....i joined the sch choir in pri sch. then i continued it in sec sch. now i wldn't hesitate nor be shy to say tat i m an active member of the choir. only i noe how much the choir has done for me! SO MUCH! i consider my choir family my third family really! i do!

but lessons i take in sch are not those needed for tamil songs rite! so last yr during the hols...my mom wanted me to attend the classical singing lessons. but i hesitated cos i thot.."wah i so old nw then u want me to join ah! haiyoh! i will feel so left out." but then...i got a perfect opportunity tat i had to grab at once! yes by joining the cca in the tamil language centre in which i take my tamil lessons! my mom was more than hapy wen she knew it was free...haha! so ya....tmr i gtg for tat lesson. i m excited but i reli dunno wat to expect! one side of my heart is heavy with fear anther side of my heart is heavy with joy! oh how nice it is....okok i think i will stop here! haha! cos i dun wanna end up typing anther poem for nth! hehe! my only aim today is to slp by ten! ten!!!!! lets see! aight! gdnitez!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

wow!

i havent been blogging for like so many days! omg! today was grt! i did have lots of fun thruout. cos in the mornin...the choir sounded reli gd wen singing the sch song n national anthem. then i had to tell a story on integrity to the WHOLE sch! haiz. i was confident. but i juz cldnt help shaking! but i noe i did my best n mr ho was like so happy! haha! then aft that i got down n walked towards my 'cher...still shakin sia! then aft that i kind of liked social studies...altho nt the subj but the fun i had...with my 'cher fooling around! haha! n then aft sch...i went for t.lit n ht lah...n in my t.lit class my pri sch fren has joined! haha! long time no see him u noe! nw i feel like seeing all my pri sch frenz! oh gosh! n i noe i din do weel in the test today! haha! cos i nv study properly! haiz....then i came back home at....7.30++pm!!! tired noe! i still have hw...1 only lah..so i think can finish!aiight! aiight! i reli dunno wat else to type so i guess i will end here!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

oh man!

i dunno wat is wrong with me! i have surely changed drastically over the hols! i realize i m so stuck with friendster and msn and blogger and yada yada yada. i still have tonnes of hw to do but here i am chatting n blogging away!!! i cant seem to stop! i m so worried as to how i m gonna concentrate on my studies! i have to do sth! think dharshini think!!! this yr is crucial! this is the yr to build my foundation! this is the only yr i can buck up in my studies! shit! oops! sry abt tat! neway i guess i will be staying up pretty late tonite! haiz i have to get my hw done dunt i! i m used to this...last min work! it has become my habit of yrs tat it is so hard to change myself now! oh god! oh lord! now come and save me, NOW!!! HAIZ...okok i guess i will juz sign out of msn n start my compo! i have two to do!! n some other small stuff!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vdukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

Happy Ponggal!!!

hey! today is a special day yea...for the hindus. we all celebrate with sweet stuff. ya. n so did i. so i juz thot y nt share some of todays fotos with u ppl....enjoy!


these are the offerings for the "Sun God"


i like this foto coos of its composition..i took it!!


my prayer room all ready with flowers


i was trying to capture the sun lah...but....


this is my bro..breaking the coconut...a common sight in rituals


this is another shot of the prayer rm. that thing infront is the flame. n i see sth in it! do u??

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonaal unai vida maaten!

So many many!!!

wow...i m bombarded with so many stuff to write about! my punishments for not blogging for sometime i guess! nt fair!!!!! okok...to make it a bit...um...."not-confusing"(still thinkin of a proper word!!)....i m gonna do this in paras! yay! here i go!

COLOURS:
u noe a few days ago i took a test on the net....it asked for my fav colour n mine is BLUE!!! okok....n here is wat it says abt me...or maybe abt those who like blue too....
Blue:
Blue is an emotional color. People with a blue personality stay within themselves and do not trust people very much. They watch every move others make. Pale shades of blue show someone who wants everything in order. Their closet is immaculate. They know where any piece of clothing is and most likely how long it will take them to get it out of the closet. As blue moves to the deeper end of color, it becomes more moody and shows it. With royal blue, one can be on a high or in the deepest of wells. This color would probably be worn by one who is deciding to parachute because it would mean one needed to make a quick decision. When looking back on that decision though, the person pulling the ripcord would not be so sure they made the correct decision. The navy colors are very emotional but also want to hide it. It's almost as if they are wallowing in the fact that they are emotional. Some women, with a navy personality, go on cleaning binges, others go shopping. If your house has too much blue in it, you may find yourself depressed most of the time. A baby put in a totally blue room cries all the time, but when taken into another room, it is a happy baby. Blue is a good color but it needs other shades to balance it. Blue people think with their emotions. They are either way up or way down; feeling all the emotions they can experience on their way to either. Crying when they are happy or sad, they are feelers. Having a need to feel every thing, they leave themselves open to others. Quickly they take the mood of any person they are around whether they are upset or elated. Feelers don't even know why their emotions run the gambit. They are products of their environment. Blue people are no fun to be around when they expect you to be down with them. Showing signs of co-dependency, they need you to be by their side feeling with them as they do.
but u noe sth ppl....i m nt exactly this type of a person u noe...except at times lah! i like to fool around one! hehe!!

FIRST DAY:
yesterday...me n my two frenz..indu n inthu...were headed to the tamil lang. cntr for our first day of tamil lit. lessons...n so my 'cher was like tellin us..take a taxi there so we wont be late. but that was the worst idea ever to follow on a RAINY DAY! a cab was hard to get outside my sch...n anyway we were late alr! i found the class quite interesting...but i still dunno wat to expect n wat is expected as the first day is still the first day only! but i m happy with the 'cher...yay! n then my frenz went back home....but i had to wait cos i oso had to go for highr tamil lessons there itself. n it was my first day there too. again i m happy with my 'cher...but first day redi gt hw sia! nvm..i will manage...hehe! n then i gt back home n had to prepare for the orientation today....n yes! that is wat is nxt!!

SEC ONE ORIENTATION:
well...sch was as usual today...then aft that i had to rush for the final practice juz one hr befre the performance! aft dressing up n "beautifying" ourselves, we(the choir lah!) started warming up n revised all the 3 songs for the day...but we were not at all warmed up! oh gosh! we sounded so bad u noe! n the mics were all so lousy...they din pick up our voices! n the piano was an old one n so the keys got stuck!!! imagine that man....there we r tryinna impress ppl n try to get them to join us but we cannot be heard n the music was chaos! haiz....we were all so disapppointed altho mr goh tried to cheer us up. then we had to set up our booth to attract ppl...but u noe....then arnd 5.30...i headed back home lah. quite tiring u noe!

EXTRA(S):
so happy i m nw
that i noe i m nt at fault!
so relieved i m nw
that i noe u haf nth against!

i thot i was to wait for longer
but i noe "no" is the ans
so i shall nt wait any longer
n worry u too!

i thot i lost
but i did not
neither did i win anth
as i believe there is still a long way!

as i said before
i have learnt to accept u
the way u r
more than comfortable being urself!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

the usual.

today was not bad actually! it's like this...i went to sch...waited for a while...went for duty... started catching problematic ppl n stopping latecomers to take down their names. 79 ppl were late today! believe aiight!! 79!!!! okok....so u noe..i was like late for class...but i had a reason so i HAD to be excused! muahahaha...but i m the one who will be lackin behind rite! so wats so cool abt tat??? hmmmm....then i had lessons...lessons n then ate burger for recess. then i had boring chemistry! i mean...no offence but the fault is nt the subject's...it is the 'cher. i mean...he talks too much! do u believe it(pls do).....he talks n talks for 1 whole hr but never teaches ANYTHING! but once again...i wont blame him either! all he wants us to do is to learn ourselves...n he will clarify our doubs(if any)...so....i guess i will need some time to accept him for who he is. juz like how i learnt to accept some other ppl for who they are! ***i have accepted u for who u r but i doubt u even realize that! cos it has been weeks since we communicated n i dunno wat went wrong where!***and then the went fine. aft sch i had to attend final choir practices before the sec 1 orientation on fri. n WE DID NOT DO FINE TODAY! EVERYONE. our power singer had a sore throat so did not sing... :( n then i came back home n just had my bath. yoohoo!! cant beleve i do so lil' in 24 hrs man! i hv so much time but soo lil' brains to use it wisely! oh wateva! i will be packin my stuff soon n going to sleep yea...so...ya! i m juz very confused from yesterdays' happening!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

oh...how nice...

oh...how nice it is to sit by my bedrom window

and do nth but to read a book:

a murder/romance book,

while the rain lulls me,

though noisily but calmingly,

although i sit there

all covered in my blanket,

cold but warm;

but i started wondering for a moment...

"it has been raining for hrs!

and i cannot stand the harsh cold winds"...

but how much i like the rain

splattering on my windowsill clumsily

and still i cannot stand the harsh cold winds,

i start pitying the trees...

how they shiver and get drenched

but still look beautiful than ever before!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

my...feelings...

ok...i was chatting with akram n i asked him what i shall blog abt. i mean i noe it is the most stupid Q to ask cos u noe it is MY blog n i ask others what to write in it! but nvm....it has been so long since i blogged properly! n nth much has happened in life that interesting to blog abt....but maybe i should just let out my feelings...he said. so here i m...(i shall start on a new para cos i just want to*wateva*)

u noe i have been waiting. (maybe it is not ur fault cos i dun expect u to noe!)
for so long i started to worry that something went wrong!
but i was so relieved when a gd time came...
cos i knew nth was wrong.
but that only meant sth WAS wrong afterall!
never uttering a word u just left me!
i still dont understand what on earth my mistake is!
i will noe oni if u tell me yea!
n this time i din care if i irritated u.
cos u have no reason to be irritated with me!!
n as far as my memory knows...i did not hurt u.
U DID!!
all i wanted was to hear a hi from u
i never knew i din deserve that!
i never knew i was so cheap to u!
afterall who am i in ur life eh?
just a piece of paper u use, crush n throw!
i m so confused!
n i wont be surprised even if i get a shuddap!
but nt even that!
oh what a friend u r!

okok nvm....that was NOT a poem by the way! mind u! well....today almost 80 ppl late sia!! had to stand there n get down all their particulars! tiring. but that is my duty n i will never hesitate to say that it is my fav activity of the day...everyday! i din like lessons today...geog, bio, maths, eng, tamil. none! somehow or another i feel like i m left out. totally left out. akram said i m short tempered...but no. he said i m impatient cos i m irritated by ppl coming late all the time...but no. i m just so....doomed. i dunno y i dun seem to like sch nowadays! but this is the time i m supposed to love sch. rite now...i have to concentrate on studies....get atmost...a 13 for my o's. i know i can do it. but i dunno if i wil.

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukidren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

my house.

hey...here is my house. one that i drew on the net....www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=14398

nice??....i forgot what it means lah!

uyirvida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

why?

just a few hrs ago as i was chatting with my teacher, i told him i was happy. but now...i m so miserable! i mean...i feel so! i m lonely. i m bored. i m sad. i m doomed. i m worried. i m confused. i m yearning. i m lookin forward to. i m waiting. i miss. i need to talk to someone. but....even when i get the chance...i cant open my mouth! why?

oh...that was nice!...yes...i just got a hug n kiss from ma dad! yay! haha! i dunno y oso. guess he realized i was moody?? atleast i noe there is someone...or maybe a few more of cos....who love n are always there for me.but u noe....

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!

I need some time...

hey ppl....i m sry i din blog for like yrs!!!!! haiz...juz din feel like it..u noe....simply like no mood!! there surely is SO MUCH i need to blog abt! the new year...back to school stuff....my 'chers....my new frenz... i juz dun feel like typing much lah!! i miss ppl....i miss all...i miss one...haiz... but i m in confision rite nw...sch's started..n some stuff r juz so...never ending!!! haiz!

uyir vida sonnaal uyir vidukindren...unai vida sonnaal unai vida maaten!